It's hard for me to ask for help! Can you relate? I'm sure you can, especially if you're a human. Women don't like to ask for help because we want to have it all together. Men don't like to ask for help because somehow it shows they're weak. In fact, BOTH of these are lies that Satan tells us to prevent us from reaching out to others for help.
For a simple example, when you were in school and couldn't spell something, what was the first thing that you would do? You would go straight to the teacher and ask how to spell it. That's asking for help!
When you were learning how to ride a bike or drive and had a trusted adult next to you and you failed, simply looking with eyes wide open was a plea for help!
The first time you became a parent, you sought after every book, article or current parent for advice on what kind of diapers to buy, how much to feed them, etc. That's asking for help!
YET, why is it so hard to ask for help now that you're an 'established' adult? Asking for help someone diminishes our own ability to do something, but it doesn't have too. Just like the previous examples, it was natural to ask for help because we didn't know how to do something, or couldn't figure it out all the way.
I've been struggling with this lately as my schedule has become a little more chaotic. Kids basketball practices, games, training clients, teaching fitness classes, kids to school, kids from school, date night, kids bball date night, kids track and dance practices, I can't possibly be in all of those places nearly at the same time. (not all of them are at the same time thankfully!).
I've had to put down my walls of 'doing it all' to 'organizing it all'. I don't have to believe the lie that I don't have it all together because I'm not the one doing the 'thing'. I have it all together because I can make sure that it all gets done, even if it's not by me. That too me the longest time to realize! And my husband asking me how to finish preparing dinner so it'll be ready in time doesn't show a weakness; it allows him to learn how to cook/prepare something different.
We can use the opportunities to ask for help as a gift that has been given to others. What I mean by that is that we love to help others, but we seldom ask for help. We're not giving someone else the opportunity and joy of helping us.
Some people that I've allowed to help me lately include:
personal trainer mentors-this is huge as I'm trying to attain clients, create my own business and be a successful trainer.
education-seeking the best education, both temporally and spiritually has come from reading valuable books and listening to insightful, truth-filled content, which sometimes takes some filtering.
spiritual strength-attending the temple frequently has allowed me the opportunity to sit in peace and quiet, serve another and gain helpful personal revelation.
counseling-Jeremy and I went to couples counseling to sort through our feelings of how we were raised, how and why we treat others the way that we do and how to face our insecurities so that we can become a stronger couple.
family relationships-seeking the advice from trusted family members and friends regarding parenting advice has helped as we are managing the safety, joy and chaos of raising a family in these seemingly tumultuous times.
What is it that's holding YOU back from asking for help? Dig deep into your thoughts and figure it out. Then go ask someone to help you so that you can become who you're meant to be by allowing others the privilege of helping you grow.